UNfashionable

WHAT THE HELMET?!

I was recently cruising to class on my red bicycle named Ruby when I encountered something mindblowing. If any of you have every ridden down Congress Street you know the  steep decline and lane-changing madness that occurs on a morning commute with half-asleep drivers shoving granola bars and hot coffee in their mouths as they slam on their breaks for a red light. As I waited at the intersection, I noticed a fellow biker beside me wearing no helmet and huge, old-school headphones.bilde

“Hey there!… Good moring?…” — Me

(No reply) — Stupid Hipster

“HEY! You should really wear a helmet on roads like this! You could get hurt!” —Me

(He removes his headphones) “Huh?” — Confused Stupid Hipster

“You should really wear a helmet!!! It makes me nervous seeing people ride without them.” — Me

“Oh… (Sarcasticly) Ok.”

The light changed and I highly doubt he took my words of advice about— Oh, I don’t know… TRYING TO SAVE HIS LIFE!?

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“Eh look at me on my fixie in this really hilly environment! I am so alternative— but I cannot actually pedal uphill…”

It seems strange that a college-educated individual, who is spending thousands of dollars on the knowledge they hold inside their precious head, wouldn’t want to protect their skull from irreversible brain damage…right?

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Oh look at this hottie… Heels, headphones, and a basket… Cringe.

Ninety-one percent of bicyclists killed in 2009 reportedly weren’t wearing helmets and helmet use has been estimated to reduce head injury risk by 85 percent. Just like wearing a seatbelt, wearing a helmet is a common sense step to saving your face from looking like this:

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No matter how careful you think you are, wrecks happen. Take it from me; I have had the pleasure of getting six stitches in my foot after a bike wreck that occurred when I was NOT EVEN MOVING! (Apologies for the graphic iPhone operating room photo!)

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Even Lance Armstrong was, at the very least, wise enough to wear a helmet, thus allowing him to live long enough to lie about his steroid use!
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So as the Athens weather starts warming up and you bring that beautiful bike out of hibernation, don’t be a fool— WEAR A HELMET! Who cares if it messes up your hair, it won’t mess up your brain.

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“Oh hey boys! Yeah, I may have a great ass, but I do not see a car that is coming!”

Who says helmets can’t be hella-cool?!

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Wearing a helmet makes you have superhuman strength!

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And all the cool kids in Athens are wearing ’em!

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So don’t be a stupid (unsafe) hipster … wear a helmet. For your sake!

UNfashionably Yours,

Anna ❤


http://youtu.be/V3nMnr8ZirI
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This entry was published on March 20, 2013 at 12:58 pm. It’s filed under Dudz and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. Follow any comments here with the RSS feed for this post.

One thought on “WHAT THE HELMET?!

  1. Thank you! I used to be that stupid unsafe hipster. Then I got hit by a car and I realized that wasn’t the best idea I ever had. Now I wear my ugly, unfashionable blue helmet. I hate it but I love my brain more.

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